A voice for anecdotes and generalizations everywhere, The Journal Of Anecdotal Science hopes to cure bad science by letting sub-standard papers be published here so that they may not have to be published elsewhere. Learn more on www.journalanecdotalscience.com !
Is Trump human ?
The Journal of Anecdotal Science took a meticulous approach to the Trump problem. Starting from Trump’s own statement “I take hairspray, and If I spray it my apartment which is all sealed, that affects the ozone layer? I say no way”.
From there we build a model of breathing and spraying within an enclosed space. The result is simple: In such conditions, a real human being would not survive; he would suffocate in under a month.
We thereby prove that Mr. Trump is clearly inhuman, what he really is we don’t know yet.
Humans are fundamentally junk
Humans contain more genetic material that is not only not used to synthesize any proteins in any known context and often this junk DNA is duplicated in the human genome. This doubly useless DNA is a likely cause of many diseases that are only found in humans.
This is good news for the dead branches on everyone’s family tree. Your useless uncle that refuses to get a job, and his wife that lady that chooses Fox News because it’s ‘real’ will likely produce the most human offspring ever: doubly increasing the ‘junk’ DNA in the gene pool.
Everyone is a liar
A Harvard PHD holder combed through terabytes worth of google query and come to an alarming conclusion: Everyone is a liar.
By comparing survey data, which is biased as individuals always ameliorate themselves, and google query which reflects what is really going on; he exposes our persona for what they are.
Whereas most of the population says they don’t watch porn, that cold hard data tells another story; the same is true for the instances of sexual intercourse per week, the average exaggeration is 100%.
The moral is this: don’t trust anyone and clear your browsing history.
Yall and Yall
Y’all can be strongly associated with the south and the gay community.
The origin of ‘yall’ is likely the American south and, as many southern things, is a strong marker of heritage. However , trend now is that its gay; joining other southern symbols, such as daisy dukes and cowboy gears, the community have reclaimed. You know the saying, once you go gay you never go back.
We can expect that since claimed ‘y’all’ has been taken, southerners will want nothing to do with it, like their politicians with anything else the community claims. Hospitality: gay. Fancy dinner parties: gay. Racial inequality: white gay.
We can see the south and the male homosexual community have more in common than either wants to admit.